We are so sad to have to say that we now have a very, very tiny angel in heaven. We are struggling with the question 'why' but are trying our best to remember everything in life serves a purpose and this is just one of those times where the purpose may never be known. We are so blessed to have Zachary in our lives and find a lot of comfort in holding him, kissing him, and watching him grow and learn every second he is awake. He is a true joy to be around and has been helping keep a smile on our faces since the day we got the bad news. For those that are curious here is our story:
On Wednesday February 24th I woke up to some bleeding. I had a routine check up that morning so I went in to see the doctor. He wasn't too concerned about the bleeding, it is actually more common than a lot of people think. When he tried to find the heartbeat and couldn't was when I got a little concerned. The doctor was still not worried, I was only 12.5 weeks and sometimes it can be hard to hear the heartbeat. He ordered an ultrasound for the next day. Luckily Tim arrived home after being gone for 2.5 weeks that night. We went in for the ultrasound the next day and there was no heartbeat. Tim saw her take the measurements and it appears the baby had stopped growing around 8.5 weeks. We had to wait until the next morning to meet with the doctor and even then he wouldn't tell us anything. I had to get more blood work. I called and called that afternoon to get the results as it was Friday and did not want to wait until Monday to know for sure. As expected my blood test showed that I was no longer pregnant. I had a D & C scheduled for Monday but had a bad feeling I would end up in the ER over the weekend. Boy was I right. That night I woke up very ill and we went in. We are so blessed to have a wonderful neighbor that came over so we could leave Zach at home. After 7 hours in the ER we came home. It was a horrible experience that I wish no one had to go through. I have been home for about a day and a half and am feeling better physically. I think it will take a very long time to heel emotionally but am taking it one day at a time. We are blessed to have such a great family and wonderful friends who are providing support in many ways even though we are so far away from each other.
“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.“ Proverbs 3:5,6